The fun things about this outfit:
Pants - B-Day Gift, Shirt - Hand Me Down, Bracelet - $1 Target,
Earrings - Old Navy ($2 sale), Shoes - Who Knows?
Just real quick I want to shout out to my lovely mom!
Yay for birthday gifts...aka: these pants!!!
Secondly... This is a long one... So sit back and relax.
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Now down the the "deep" thoughts of my afternoon as I sat in a coffee shop with way to many books and notebooks open in front of me. {Sometimes I can't stick to just one... ya know?}
In general I do not consider myself very easily frightened. Startled...YES. But frightened? Nope.
Did I jump when I saw the thumb sized spider while I showered in a 2ftx2ft box that my basement apartment has? YES. But did I quickly gain my composure and smash that lil sucker with my bare hands?... Also, YES.
See the difference? Being Startled vs. Being Afraid?
People have phobias, right? I suppose I do, too. I mean I'm not super fond of heights, deep murky open water, or fire being right up in my personal bubble. But if I absolutely had to deal with those things, I could. Cross that bridge when we come to it sort of attitude I guess.
I've been realizing in the past year or so that the intangibles are more where my real fears are held. Things like the what the future holds, or having stability, or if the solid true friendships now will actually last. I suppose though that I've been realizing those fears because I've been learning about the solution to them. You see I used to think I could use sheer will power to think fear away. Or maybe if I plan everything super well, then everything will work out how I hoped that it would. But... That's just not how it works.
You know what is amazing?
To NOT be afraid!
If you've ever read my rambling before, you know that I follow Jesus. And guess what! Because of Jesus, I've found something out. I don't have to be afraid. There are some things that we DO have though. You know... Instead of fear.
{2 Timothy 1:7 says, "for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and sound mind."}
That's right! when I place my life in the holey {and holy} hands of Jesus He takes away any ounce of fear I had. And in place of it, He empowers me, enables me to love, and develops in me clarity and discernment. Fair trade? Heck no. But I'll take it!
What this means though is that when I am afraid, I can be confident it is not from my Savior. And in that I am also confident that I can run to Him for help, reassurance, and peace. I can rest and know that He is trustworthy and I can without hesitation, let Him do His thing.
Now some fears are still going to arise, however irrational they may be.
You know... like the time I mistakenly agreed to go to the haunted corn maze and the masked man, revving a chain saw chased me screaming into the arms of some guy...some poor girls boyfriend no doubt...cause she sure gave me the stink eye as I came to my senses. Yep! Sometimes I forget to run into the arms of Christ.
I suppose it's a long road and not a cul-de-sac. There will be potholes and speed bumps in the form of chain saws or unknown choices, but I know the road keeps going after and there is power, love, and sound mind ready to be taken advantage of!
Here are a few things I was reading today.
Psalm 56: 3-4
When I am afraid,
I put my trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise,
in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.
What can flesh do to me?
Isaiah 11:2
And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him,
the Spirit of wisdom and understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and might,
the Spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord.
Romans 8:15
For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear,
but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”
2 Corinthians 2:12
Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God,
that we might understand the things freely given us by God.
